A few weeks ago, I had surgery to repair an inguinal hernia. Two weeks later I was at the doctor’s rooms again, only to discover that somehow, I had hand, foot and mouth.
The doc prescribed meds and instructed me to keep a low profile and rest.
Allow me to take a minute to reflect on this. On some level, it feels good to be told to rest. It’s like you can take a deep breath and go, “Okay, I need to not put my body through any stress. I need to just lie down, watch Netflix, eat and sleep.” I mean, who doesn’t want to take it easy?
Only those who are addicted to a life otherwise. Athletes and adrenaline junkies who are hooked on being perceived as “tougher” and “stronger”. Survival of the fittest and all that.
And I have had to concede, I’m addicted. The word has negative connotations to it, but I’ve taught myself that it’s ok because there are far worse things I could be addicted to.
Also, tell any elite or age-group athlete that he or she needs to take it slow and rest, is like telling a puppy to sit.
So I find I’m having to reform certain narratives in my head. Narratives like these:
- If I don’t exercise, I’ll grow fat and lazy.
- If I’m fat and lazy, that will affect my family in negative ways – my wife won’t find me attractive and my kids will grow up with a blueprint of their dad sitting around all day long.
- The world places a high value on results – how do I find my place in the world if I can’t deliver results?
- Striving is good – “No pain, no gain”.
- I need exercise to stay sane – to tick all the boxes above and to release endorphins to help me cope.
But in the interests of my own mental health, I had to question those narratives. I had to ask: “is there another way?”
I unlearned and learned something all at once (https://youtu.be/oXeQrmLUH24) watching triathlete Lionel Sanders race against his vlogging cameraman, Talbot Cox. It was a cycle challenge up Mount Lemmon in Arizona, where Lionel (a pro triathlete) wasn’t allowed to raise his heart rate over 110 beats per minute, and Talbot (usually the behind the camera lens) could go as hard as he wanted. The result was fascinating.
Talbot tried to stay on the wheel of Lionel for the first section, sending his heart rate into orbit at 195 beats per minute. Needless to say, he couldn’t sustain that and dropped off the pace pretty soon, while Lionel casually ascended without raising his heart rate above 110. And Lionel won.
On reflection, both men pointed to the lesson that you should always race “within yourself”, rather than try to keep up with someone who is a) stronger, and b) riding at a different pace. If Talbot had started slower, with a lower heart rate, Lionel reckoned the whole thing would have been different.
For me, in the season of my life where I was told to slow down, I took heed from Talbot’s lesson. Along the way I admit, I used expletives, but I won’t here. The first lesson was this: slow riiiiiight down.
The second lesson was this: it’s all in your head.
Growing up with a father who was a marathon runner – both training and racing – we were privy to nuggets of wisdom from the endurance world every so often. The undercurrent of all those nuggets was that challenges are just about always overcome in your mind. Here are some (paraphrased) that I remember:
- The hardest part of training is putting your shoes on.
- Any challenge can be tackled, as long as you have a good swab of Vaseline three inches up your nose.
- It’s not the will to win that matters — everyone has that. It’s the will to prepare to win that matters.
There’s plenty of wisdom there. And like the book of Proverbs says,
“Get wisdom; develop good judgment.”
Proverbs 4:5 (NLT)
So I did my best to reform those narratives:
- I’ll get to exercise again once I’m rested, and I’ll be grateful.
- My family will learn from a season of rest and just allowing some time together. They know it’s just a moment – that I can’t sit still forever. They also see me being disciplined by NOT rushing.
- The world places a high value on results – make sure you actually finish, and finish well, rather than limping because you rushed too early, or worse – did not get a finish result at all
- Striving is in your mind – the best endurance athletes know when it’s time for pain, in order to maximise the gain. Most of the time, it’s simply about moving forward – however fast or slow.
- I can do other things besides exercise to stay sane – fulfilling in different ways.
Yup, life is a marathon, not a sprint. The older I get, the more cliches I encounter. But cliches are cliches for a reason, and the marathon is in the mind.
